Ignorance endorsed by a great authority will not become truth.

Sadhguru
Sadhguru
Photo of the Indian mystic, Sadhguru by Russavia via Wikipedia commons

The quality of our lives boils down to this: the nature of our relationship with ourselves and those around us.

We want to be happy and loved. We want our lives to mean something to someone else too. We are constantly taking actions and moving towards people we think will make our lives better.

The goal itself is simple but the players (you and others) aren’t. People can be quite erratic. We, on the other hand, are constantly making wrong assumptions about what we really need to be happy.

We create conditions here and there, and without realizing it, we’ve become so complex we don’t understand ourselves let alone others. …


It’s not just envy.

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Photo by Polina Zimmerman from Pexels

It was difficult for me to get used to, but I eventually got used to it. I mean, it’s one thing to be hated for being a thief, a bully, a bad driver, or a snitch, but to be hated for putting in the hard work and succeeding feels totally different.

Sometimes people don’t just want you to succeed. It’s a very unsettling thought, but it happens. And oftentimes, we would rather dismiss it to ourselves. Maybe that friend who suddenly became touchy when you delivered the good news about your promotion was just having a bad day. Who knows? …


Ideas from Malcolm Gladwell, Jordan Peterson, Maya Angelou, Arthur Schopenhauer, and Ryan Holiday.

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Photo of Malcolm Gladwell by Pop!Tech via Wikipedia commons

Becoming a successful writer is no doubt one of the most difficult (and rewarding) professional achievements in life. Usually, it takes years to build the skill and emotional stability required to handle the rejections and suspense that comes with wondering how people will receive what you create.

Each creation is like a child, one you can’t bear being seen rejected. This is why writing is one craft that is impossible to succeed at without a personal love and connection to the craft; the challenges can only be withstood for the love of the craft itself, not its reward. It’s no wonder why writers are usually very deep. The beauty of the craft is in going to the depth of your soul and clarifying your own ideas on a blank page. …


3. Don’t be angry with a stone.

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Photo by Jorge Fakhouri Filho from Pexels

The ordinary acts we practice every day are more important for our growth than their simplicity might suggest. As the American author, Andy Andrews put it,

“Everything you do matters. Every move you make, every action you take...matters. Everything you do matters to all of us forever.”

On the one hand, it may seem extreme and overbearing to say that everything we do matters, but on the other hand, it also suggests that we have an infinite opportunity for growth. It means that we can add a little tweak to even the tiny, seemingly unimportant things we do every day to improve ourselves. …


How conformity, rigidity, impatience and inconsistency affects creativity.

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Photo of Robert Greene via Wikipedia commons

Listen to the audio version of this article here.

So far, Robert Greene has displayed profound creativity, adaptability, and hard work by churning out six international bestsellers. Apart from his in-depth analysis of human nature and life in general, his books always have a touch of unconventional and thought-provoking ideas, making his works always get people’s attention.

Being creative entails getting in touch with what makes you unique; it entails having the courage to look at life fearlessly through your own eyes, and expressing what you see or feel despite the probability of being misunderstood. …


1. Everything doesn’t happen for a reason.

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Photo by Amina Filkins from Pexels

The more we know, the better we become. Though there will never be a point where we’ll have all the rules we need to live life perfectly, what we can do is to keep learning. With each information we are exposed to, we become better, and consequently, we do better.

Though our goal isn’t to outgrow anyone, it is our intellectual responsibility to outgrow who we used to be. It is how we reduce the gap between who we are and who we want to be. Growth is how we fulfill our innate longing for meaning. …


1. Don’t base your evaluation on what’s most apparent.

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Photo by Jack Sparrow from Pexels

We’ve all been in situations where we assumed certain things about people only to find them to be the opposite of what we’ve pictured them to be.

This could be the perfect looking guy or girl we finally went on a date with only for our wild imaginations to be crushed by reality. Or the boss we’ve always admired from afar, only to find out their true nature when we get a chance to work closely with them.

We are constantly in situations where our assumptions of people are nowhere close to reality. Often, our evaluation of people’s character is formed before we even know them. We merely project our own assumptions of what their nature should be, based on what we’ve learned from society. …


Every moment is a part of your extraordinary story.

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Photo by mentatdgt from Pexels

We get bored, not because our lives are boring, but because we’ve become too accustomed to seeing only heightened versions of reality.

On average, adults in Africa and South America spend more than 3 hours on social media every day. Meaning we spend over 21 hours a week looking mostly at snapshots of the best moments of the lives of others.

When you go on YouTube, most of the popular videos are usually a compilation of the best motivational videos, best movie scenes, best red carpet moments, best parkour moves, best everything. …


1. They always overthink before taking action.

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Photo by Engin Akyurt from Pexels

Overly seeking the approval of others can make an already difficult life hell to live in.

I remember when I switched schools in my third year in secondary school, I would wake up each night for five days straight with thoughts of panic. “What would my new classmates think of me? Omg! what are the girls like? They are all probably very smart in that school.” The thoughts of me being rejected by my new classmates were terrifying and nerve wrecking.

We all care, to an extent, about what others think of us. To completely ignore what people think of you is impractical. However, some people are on the extreme of the approval-seeking spectrum. Why? Because if we don’t have an internal metric which we evaluate ourselves, we’ll do anything to get a good evaluation from others. …


No, it isn’t about just saying what you think or doing what you want.

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Photo by Ali Pazani from Pexels

“Look, I’ll be honest with you, that’s just a stupid idea.”

Comments like this used to make me feel like an authentic person. Like many people, I confused authenticity with rudeness. Sometimes we excuse our insensitivity and lack of care as a sign that we are authentic. Sure, authenticity indeed makes you more honest, but that’s just a part of what it entails; it also makes you a better person.

Usually, the signs are more internal, like a dimension of consciousness that begins to open up to you as you understand yourself and life better. The good news is that we all know what authenticity feels like. We’ve all had glimpses of it from time to time, some more than others. …

About

Destiny Femi

Writer. Learner. Lover of great books. I write about everything I learn about living a better life. Contact — https://www.linkedin.com/in/destiny-femi-67568a19b

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